Pulling back the mask...just a little bit

I have been pretty secretive about my identity on this blog {still can't believe I posted pictures..even if they were faceless!} and am still hesitant to go all out with my identity.

I am not sure what is holding me back from sharing everything, but if figure a little here and a little there is the way to go. So, moving slowly but surely I decided to throw my name out there.

So...hi blog world, you can call me Jan. Nice to meet you!

I ♥ MFD

I know that I do better when I track my food intake and exercise. Granted, I always have an idea as to where I am, but it's always good to know, not just have an idea. I have gone back to using MyFoodDiary on a daily basis rather than only using it when I feel like it.

{this was my food intake yesterday. no protein shakes...oops.}

I love being able to look back over the weeks, months and years {yes, I have been using this site for years...it's just that good!} and see my progress, not-so-good times, and plan from there. It's a great tool...I just need to take full advantage of it!

Do you have a favorite calorie counter site?

It's nearly here

I don't know why I am such crap when it comes to setting and keeping goals, but it's something that has never come easy to me.

That being said, I am trying to make a change in that area.

In seven short months I will be 30 years old. My goal is to have my weight out of the 2's and into the 1's by my 30th birthday.

I am working on putting together a plan, on paper (OK, probably a spreadsheet☺), to keep me on track to achieving this goal.

Sharing it here will be one more way I can be help accountable...so hold me accountable, 'kay?

Balls!

Protein balls, that is.

Protein shakes have always been hard for me to do, so I've looked into other ways to get my protein powder in. The latest discovery, Protein Balls.

I halved the recipe since it was my first try and they turned out pretty good, although a bit drier than the ones in their picture.

Protein Peanut Butter Balls

2 scoops chocolate whey protein powder

1/4 cup honey

3/4 cup raw oats

1 cup peanut butter

Mix all these ingredients in a large bowl.

Form into small 1" balls and place on a baking sheet.

Place in oven at 375 degrees for 5-10 minutes.

Any other ideas?

I might melt

Got a 5K coming up this weekend (one little goal to check of my list) and have wanted to 'train' a bit outside.

See, I've been doing most of my movin' on a treadmill, inside. Outside it's in the 90's...not my kinda weather, for exercising at least.

So, I know 5K really isn't that far, but in the hotty-hot sun, it's a bit brutal.

I've got to get some outside exercise fit in somewhere in the next few days just to prep myself. Better down some extra H2O too!

Steppin'

I read somewhere that the average number of steps one takes is around 10,000 steps.

I got a little curious and thought it'd be neat to see how many steps I put in per day. I picked up a nifty little pedometer at Target to get me started. I know it isn't top of the line, but I just wanted to get an idea as to where I am .

I figure I can use this as a little motivational tool...you know, try to outdo my steps from the day before and everything. So, how many steps do you think I'll clock tomorrow??

Stalling

I've quit posting because I've quit making progress...and I am sick of it. I've thought of activity after activity that I can do to get some exercise, but I just can't seem to get on board and stick with any of them.

• I did some ocean swimming while on vacation and loved it, so I thought I'd take up swimming at the gym when I got home. Got a swim cap and everything...yet to even try it out.


• Groupon had a great deal for Bikram Yoga classes (which I've thought about doing, but never done) so I bought the classes, along with a yoga mat and yoga pants. Still not attended a class or used the yoga mat.

I could go on and on, but I don't see the point. I have to quit dwelling on the downside and just get moving on something!

Any motivational tips or tools that any of you have found helpful?

It'll be the death of me

Asparagus, that is.

I made some last night as part of our green themed, St. Patty's Day dinner and brought some leftovers for lunch.

First bite was of asparagus, and I have been fighting it for the past 20 minutes. Man, this stuff is really doing a number on me!

It's hard to have certain food that you like so much, but just don't jive with the band.

What is your fav food that you can no longer tolerate?

Frump

Even though it's only been a pound or two loss here and there for the past little bit, I am starting to notice a difference in the way my clothes fit.

There is one part of me that is jumping for joy at the sign of progress, but there is also the side of me that doesn't like the way my clothes are currently fitting. I feel a little on the frumpy side, but don't want to buy a bunch of new clothes that will only fit for a little while.

So, I remember the part of me that feels ecstatic by my loss and just roll with it. ☺

Doing dotFit

My gym had an awesome deal for the month of February for dotFit, so just had to take advantage of it.

Any dotFit users out there? I usually use MyFoodDiary, but at this great discount ($30 up front and then it's free as long as I have a Gold's Gym membership), I couldn't pass it up.

I am supposed to meet with one of their trainers this week to get everything set up.

Wish me luck!

Ah, too tight!

For the first time in what seems like FOREVER I made myself a protein shake for breakfast. I mixed the following up in my trusty ol' Magic Bullet:

• 1 1/2 scoops of Designer Whey Chocolate Peanut Caramel protein powder
• 1/2 cup light Silk chocolate milk
• 1 teaspoon reduced fat peanut butter

The problem was...I couldn't keep it down. My Doc stays to use such a small amount of liquid to keep it thick, thus keeping you full, but it was too thick for me to pass.

I was sipping it on my way to work and had to pull over part way there because I was about to lose it. I gave it a little time and then starting sipping again...even slower and it was OK, but a little uncomfy.

I am always SO tight in the mornings. Do any of you have this problem?

I have returned.

I took a hiatus from blogging for a bit. Okay, it was more of an extended vacation, but I am back...I hope for the long haul, and I plan to stick with it.

I know that going at this weight loss thing on my own just doesn't work for me. I've been overwhelmed with work, school, and just life in general and I am barely keeping my head above water. I've realized that I need to have outside support and influences to keep my motivation going...at least for now.

I've recommitted myself to following my exercise/eating/supplement guidelines in hopes of seeing a better result. Now I've just GOT to stick to it. I might need some support...help me, won't you? ☺

Back in action

I was sick all last week and stayed home most of the time.

Can I get a 'Blah!' ?!

I've sat home for as long as I could stand and I am ready to jump back into the real world.

I have a big exam tonight that I haven't done lots of studying for, so I think I'll have to skip the gym today to brush up on my knowledge, then I'll pick my work out schedule back up on Tuesday.

My scale says I've dropped 6 pounds, but I am chalking that up to not feeling well. If it stays for another day or so, I figure it's a keeper!

I gotta take my Vitamins!

Heard back from the Doc/Nurse. I've been instructed to take:

• 2 gummy multi-vitamins, 4 times daily
• 750 mg liquid (blech!) Calcium Magnesium Citrate, 5 times daily
• 2,000 IU Vitamin D, twice daily
• 50,000 IU Vitamin D, 3 times a week
• 2 Chromagen Forte 150 (Iron), twice daily
• 1,000 mg B12 injections, twice weekly
• 30 g protein (in powder form), 3 times daily

I am supposed to do this for two months, have my labs done again and they will determine if I can continue taking at these levels, or if the doses need to be upped.

Is it just me, or does this sounds a little excessive!?! They all have to be spaced just so because some have to be taken with food, some without, some can't be taken at the same time as the others. And, this doesn't even include my normal daily prescriptions (the pill, etc.)!

I am all for being healthy, but this seems a little over the top to me. Are these the levels of supplements that your Doctors are encouraging you to take...or am I just 'lucky'?

No fill for you...err, I mean me.

My fill appointment was a complete and total waste of time...and money!

I was seen by a new (not so nice) nurse. Based on the tightness I have in the morning she wouldn't give me a fill. What!?! Bummer.

The results from my labs that I had taken on Monday hadn't arrived at their office, so I had no reason to even show up. The lab results were faxed over as I was walking out of my appointment, which I was still charged for.

She said she would 'review my labs after she gets back from lunch and then will call in any prescriptions I may need.'

Turns out my levels are super low on just about everything...except protein!

I have got to get my butt in gear and get back on all my supplements on a regular basis.

Dreaded Dr. appt

My fill appointment is tomorrow afternoon and I am super nervous.

I've been putting the visit off for some time because I am not in the shape/at the weight I wanted to be in when my Doc saw me next.

I really don't want to see his face when the number on the scale doesn't read too far from the number it was on my last visit.

I'll have to dress in something really slimming tomorrow. ☺

Hi, I am a major procrasinator

This was SO my workout yesterday!!! I've been working every day in my time between work and school, but yesterday was a school holiday so I kept going back and forth as to whether or not it should constitute a work out day as well.

Slacker, I know!

After putting it off for as long as I could, I finally gave in and went to the gym. It was pretty late and I was quite the tired, so I did only 20 minutes of cardio and spent about the same on weights and then I was out of there.

Yes, it could have been a more intense workout, but I am just concentrating on the fact that I showed up and put in a little effort. Right now, I get points for that...I won't be too hard on myself in the beginning. It's just important that I am developing a schedule for right now...I will concentrate on the details once I have the schedule down.

Take 3 or 4 big gulps...

This morning I had my 1 year post-op (a little late!) labs and upper GI swallow done in preparation for my check up/fill appointment this Friday

Now really, is there anything that tastes worse than that barium gunk they make you drink for the x-ray!?! I was seriously struggling to keep from gagging the stuff back up!

The radiologist said that my stoma was so small he was curious as to how I was able to handle solids. This surprised me! I scheduled a fill because I thought I was too loose.

Now I am unsure of if I want to keep my fill appointment or not. Normally I wouldn't cancel it, but my Doc charges $200 an appointment and I don't want to go if I have no reason to be seen. I'll marinate on it for a day or so before I decide...

So far, so good

I've stuck to working out at the gym all week long! I know that this doesn't sound like that big of a deal, but it kind of is...I typically start strong and then begin to taper off until I quit working out all together. Not anymore though!

I just need to make sure that I keep up the momentum in the weeks to come...and I can't slack on the weekends! Weather permitting we'll probably take our dog on a couple of long walks with plenty of hills involved.

Progress Pics

I am super hesitant to post these pics because I am a big ol' baby that is worried about losing whatever anonymity I have here. But when it all comes down to it...what does it really matter?

• Picture 1 - Two weeks pre-surgery (7/08)
• Picture 2 - One year post surgery (7/09)
• Picture3 - Now (9/09)

I wanted to post some before, before shots...you know, pre weight gain, but I have to dig a little deeper for those.

I get a little bummed when I look at this...so much time has passed, but I am not seeing the results I was hoping for. My Doc says that I am losing at a good, steady pace, so I do have to take some comfort in that.

I still have a LONG way to go!